


Obsessive Tendencies

by BumbleBooty



Category: Dead by Daylight (Video Game)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-13
Updated: 2018-12-13
Packaged: 2019-09-12 04:45:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,024
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16866394
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BumbleBooty/pseuds/BumbleBooty
Summary: Michael's thoughts on the situation he has found himself in.





	Obsessive Tendencies

Obsession was a strange thing to describe- especially when I refuse to explain with words.

Yes, I can speak. I never tried to deny that I couldn't, it was too much work for those that don't truly care.

My eyes traveled over the walls of Léry's Memorial Institute, and I feel the muscles under my skin crawl with disgust. 

I didn't like this 'map', nor the man in the fog that called it his territory. Yes, Herman and Sally both were polite and professional- but I know they are like Dr. Loomis deep down. They detest those who do not function 'normally', viewing them more as playthings to be studied than people who actually required assistance. 

Either way, I did not require their help. I knew what was wrong with me, and I know the Entity told them as well. 

That's why Herman pestered me for coming to him for 'continued assistance.' 

I almost wanted to stab him, but it would only act as proof to him that I needed more useless counseling. He wanted me to  _talk_ \- as they  _always_ did. None of them understood that words weren't necessary. They  _needed_ to hear it.

To me, that seemed more abnormal than anything. 

But it just means that they won't understand me.

They won't understand anything I feel- that's why they will never understand how _true_ obsession feels.

They will only know the draw of The Entity in a poor recreation.

They only _know_ the promise of reward. Not the intensity of the feelings themselves. 

They will never know what it's like to be drawn by a flash of gold- a temptation of a memory. 

They will never know the adoration of crimson sliding down silver, contrasting it against the not-my face in the polished finish of my blade.

They will never _savor_ the way their heart pounds when their eyes fall on loose curls, flattened into waves by natural grease and the inability to comb it as her feet flew around a corner.

 _They will never know what it's like_ to _silence_ someone that made their life a _living **hell**._ To be _**free** _of the crushing weight of humiliation.

Judith's face flashes through my mind when Boo rounds another corner, wearing that angry glare and defiant frown. I know she will turn out as Judith did- kind on the outside, with a dark hate curling over her heart at the slightest of inconveniences. 

Contrary to popular belief, I am _not_ stupid. I saw it in her the moment I laid eyes on her walking with that young boy.

I had _seen_ that poorly hidden disgust at his very _existence_ , hidden behind seemingly playful barbs and slightly-too-rough elbow jabs. 

I would make her understand her hatred, even if I couldn't fully escape the prison of my own thoughts that drove me to distraction by staring.

That's what brothers do after all, isn't it?

Brothers help their sisters.

So using my own understanding of my obsessive tendencies, I vowed to myself to help her with her own- that self-obsession carefully hidden under 'vanity' and 'pride', boosting her above others where she was seemingly untouchable. 

I don't need Loomis' many degrees to know when someone was dangerous.

I have been able to tell all along.

I had been able to sense Judith's uncontained rage at our father, how it was taken out on Boo and I each night after he and mother had gone to sleep. I had seen the lingering stare that rested on Boo's tiny chest, and the way Judith's fingers would grip whatever she was holding- a book, a spoon, a knife-

I accepted the consequences of my actions without resistance. Mother told me it would be alright- that I needed help. 

Young boys shouldn't feel this way, after all.

I had thought Boo being away from Judith would be enough, that mother would protect Boo from the 'evil' that Loomis claimed ran through my mind- the evil I knew Judith held in hers as well.

But mother fell to her own evil.

Our father couldn't bear to look at Boo after that. He abandoned her as well.

Then my Boo was left unattended. It took me forever to find out where she was-  _who_ she was- 

And I had been too late.

That's when the Entity came.

It whispered it's false promises in my ear, I had seen through them. 

_But._

There _was_ an upside to its offer. 

Boo would be contained. Her 'evil' wouldn't harm anyone, as Judith had been so close to doing. 

I had accepted its offer. I had killed her friends as an offering- as proof of my worth. 

All to keep others safe from her- to keep her safe from herself. 

I felt sorry for those at the 'survivor camp'. They are now stuck with Boo.

But she is a charming young lady. She won't let then see the evil that was obvious to me. 

As for me, I could easily play the role of the 'bad guy'... of the killer that slaughtered them all on sight.

Of the monster that was obsessed with spilling his baby sister's blood.

All for the chance to keep Boo in a state where she couldn't act on the evil within us. 

I would sacrifice the bond we could have had in order to keep her scared of me- of who she could become. 

After all, she can only be so bold when she knew I could be lurking anywhere, ready to put her back into a safer mental place. 

I gripped my knife harder as I felt the Entity fall away from my body. It was eerily similar to an embrace our mother would give me.

So was the praise it whispered in my ear as Boo's hands limply swayed at her side. Her blood was dripping from my knife to the floor, and I could hear the pained whimpers of the city girl behind me. 

I turned as the Entity took Boo out of this match. 

The artist fled with a flash of pale skin. 

I need to stop getting distracted. After all, I have work to do now. 


End file.
